Every so often, you come upon flight attendants who actually enjoy their jobs and have fun with the passengers. You know when the plane parks people usually start getting up before the fasten seatbelt sign goes off, even though they tell you not to as soon as you land? I remember this one flight when I was younger, as soon as the plane parked some people started getting up, but the chief purser goes on the speaker and says: “uh uh uuuuuuunuh” and people sat down so fast, it was jokes. Well, I had another jokester on this flight, and he pulled tons of one-liners. We were in line waiting to take off, and usually no one listens to what the flight attendants say over the speaker phone, and this guy knew it, so he starts telling people that while we wait, we can have a look at the in-flight magazine, and, to see who was paying attention, tells us to flip to p.17 because it teaches us how to shoplift more effectively. Then, after we take off, he says the usual: “if there is anything we can do to make your flight more enjoyable, please let us know” but adds: “and, if there is anything that YOU can do to make OUR flight more enjoyable, please let us know, too”. A super enjoyable flight later (one that I slept through, but that most people watched the free entertainment on [the visa machine was broken, so they gave it to us for free]), we land, and he tells us, as usual, “to open the overhead compartments as items may have shifted” but then adds: “and may fall out and knock your head off”. Super jokester. And I’m pretty sure he was Scottish, so super entertaining accent on top of it!
Anyways, I land in Perth early, and hop on a bus to UWA (University of Western Australia), passing through downtown (the only time I’ve been in the city, so far). I get off the UWA, and Ducky comes to meet me to bring me back to rez aka college! Yay epic reunion! We get to his college, which is the relig college on campus. Like giant Jesus on cross at the entrance, and decent chapel in front. Yeehaw. Drop my stuff, pay for a mattress/ breakfast, meet up with Kari, and head for lunch (semi-illegal, because lunch is not included in my plan, but “we didn’t know that”). After meeting a bunch of Ducky’s friends at lunch, including this Asian girl who is apparently really jealous of me because she really wishes she was Jewish, it’s time to go touring, and apparently the place to go is Freemantle, because they have super cute market and we can have a good Australian dinner there. We go through a couple of markets, buy some souvenirs, get minorly lost, get some Aussie equivalent to Cold Stone (called Cold Rock lol), wander some more, then go for burgers at this brasserie called Little Creatures. After dinner, we head back to college and decide to stay in and chill around here with Ducky’s friends, who were drinking what they call “goon,” ie: cheap wine in a bag. Like $10 for 4L cheap. Classy Australian invention. We have an early wake-up call, so around midnight it’s time for bed.
Breakfast at 7:30am, then it’s time to go to Margaret River, a big wine-producing region about 4 hours south of here. Ducky planned the weekend for me, but a bunch more people wanted to join, so in the end we are 2 full cars heading there! The non-Jew car (minus Mel, who is Jewish) headed there first, because they had a tour planned at noon that cost $55 and took them to 4 wineries and the fruit and nut factory. We, however, being the Jews we are, left a bit later because we decided to drive the area. So Jade drove us there, but then I decided to be designated driver, and drove between the vineyards and spit, instead of swallow, the wine, which is what you are supposed to do, anyways. Slash yes, I know a lot of jokes can be made here, thus the specifying of wine. Cool. Lunch at Dome, first, which gets interrupted slightly by an ANZAC day parade! There’s a band and a group of people marching, but soon after, the parade is over. Cars were actually in the middle of the parade, which was quite odd. Next stop, the vineyards, and instead of 4 wineries, we hit up, in just 4 hours, 11 vineyards. Whattup. Epic success. Like epic. And by the end, most of the car was fairly tipsy. After a nap at the hostel, Jade even woke up hung over! Slash also, should mention that we took a bunch of pictures at the vineyards. Because we are cool. And because the trees were “so pretty” (according to Kari, the nature lover). Dinnertime came around, and after trying and failing to find a restaurant to accommodate 10 people, we went to Settlers Tavern, this giant restaurant that was totally packed, and stared at tables as we waited in line to order our food. We jumped on a table for 6, that we squished in on for a while, and eventually the table next to us emptied and we jumped on that too, and pushed the tables together – success! It’s funny how all the restaurants I’ve been to since I got here are order at counter restaurants, get a number, and the waiters/ waitresses come find you. This restaurant is huge though, and I’m thinking that some of the food must get cold because it’s hard to find the number sometimes… I dunno. I think it’s a weird system, but that’s just me, I guess.
After dinner we go back to the hostel to chill, and I Skype for a bit, only that a stupid Indian girl decides that it’s a good idea to put a fork and stick it in the element of a toaster, causing everything to short. FAIL. Super pain the butt cuz I lose Internet time. Grr. It’s time to be sociable again, so I go back into my room, where apparently, the party is at. But I am super le tired, and somehow pass out as everyone is still chilling in my room (success on corner top bunk bed). Wake up super early for phone date, and everyone is still sleeping. After the call, I decide to be productive and do what I do best, puzzles. There are 2 fairly difficult puzzles there, but I don’t really have time for either, so I start on the less difficult one, with 1 hour until the others wake up for check-out. Meet some sketchy English guy who creeps me out, and try to ignore him, but he like lives at the hostel, so fail, he lingers. Continue working on puzzle and try to ignore (successfully, cuz other people get up and he bothers them). Then it’s time to pack up and go get breakfast. Eat some not-so-cooked pancakes with lots of syrup, go through a market, a fudge factory, and a bunch of stores, and finally go to the car and drive out to this olive oil factory. Do lots of olive oil sampling, and it’s off to stop #2, a vineyard we went to the day before for Kari to get her parents wine. After some more wine tastings, we head to the chocolate factory, where the Jew in us comes out. So, they have 3 bowls of chocolate chips (dark, milk, and white) and little white spoons in each, for people to take samples. Only that Ducky finds a paper bag that they use to sell the other chocolate and starts to grab handfuls of chocolate chips and puts them in the bag. Then he starts getting the rest of us to help him out, to fill up the bag the best we can. So we start casually going to the bowls, and then meet behind some shelves and fill the bag. It looks super sketch, and once we are satisfied with the fullness of our bag, we head out to the nut factory next door, where they have biscuit and chocolate samples, sauce/ dip/ chutney/ jam samples, and ice cream. I burn my tongue on a hot sauce, buy said hot sauce for “690 cents” and time to hit up a brewery at last! We get to Bootleg Brewery, and it’s packed. And I mean, packed. It’s ANZAC weekend, so it’s expected, but we can barely get in the place. And we have to pay slash are expected to buy a glass, at least. So we decide to try the next brewery next door instead, Duckstein Brewery. We get there, and it’s even more packed! And we still can’t get free beer. So we go into the vineyard that is attached, and get some free bread/ dipping samples and then get taste some wine while we’re at it. At this point, we are all full from our sampling, and decide it’s time to head home.
It’s a long ride, and at some point I doze off without realizing it. Wake up, and we’re about 1.5 hours away, and it’s time to stop for a late lunch/ snack. Somehow the topic of sleep comes up, and I learn that I had totally fallen asleep on Kari and passed out for like an hour! Oops jk. Fail on me. Clearly I can fall asleep anywhere. Semi-success? Anyways, we get back to the hostel around 5pm, Jade leaves, we get dinner, and Ducky and I decide to watch Pineapple Express – amazing call. Super funny, if you haven’t seen it. I totally laughed out loud. Might have shrieked a bit, too (in the laughing process). Aaaaaaaaand you are now caught up. Because that just happened. Like the movie ended right before I finished writing this. Success.
So, I feel like this blog will not live up to Kari and Ducky’s expectations, but hey, I am le tired. We had quite the busy last 2 days, and they were really fun but really tiring. So time for le bed. If there are any complaints about this blog, please go to Helen Wait. I know – lame joke. And if you don’t get the joke, read the name a couple of times.
So have a good night, mes amis, and I will write again soon, most likely from KL!
Lots of love,
Kat xo
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